Tuk-tuk

After leaving our hotel only ten minutes ago, we are once again lost. It is hot, sticky, and our feet are heavy and sore. Night has fallen and a whirl of cars purr around us. Bangkok's web of streets has baffled us again. I'm sure I could find a streetlamp, pull out a map, and retrace our steps, but we are just too exhausted.

We flag down a tuk-tuk and he careens to the side of the road with a large giddy smile on his face. “Hello, my friend! Where are you going?”

Like fools we climb into the small taxi, relieved to be off our feet, and fail to negotiate a price before taking off. “Chinatown,” I command.

I know we're close, and an honest tuk-tuk driver should only charge 50 Baht, but I'm sure this one will charge at least a hundred. “How much do you want to pay me?” he asks.

“What ever you'd like,” I respond, surprised at myself for talking more foolishness.

“200 Baht,” he quickly replies. That's crazy you blood-sucking scam artist!

“But, I have a proposal,” he rattles off in broken English. “I have a friend who owns a clothing store. I take you to his store and you go in and pretend like you're interested. You don't have to buy anything. After five or ten minutes you leave. He gives me free fuel. Then I take you to Chinatown for only 100 Baht. You help me and I help you.”

Oh, boy. What have we gotten ourselves into? Jenelle and I agree to the shady proposition, and in an instant the driver makes a right-hand turn and we are racing through unknown streets and might as well be traveling to Timbuktu.

Tuk-tuk in Ayutthaya

Five minutes later, we pull up to a tailor shop. Bangkok is famous for its cheap tailored suits. Although the idea has crossed my mind, a brand new suit just isn't in the budget for this trip.

We walk inside and are immediately ushered into a back room by a swarthy-skinned young man wearing a Rolex watch, à la mode gray slacks, a black shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and glasses that make him look like Elvis.

He begins to pull out fabric and we play along and I choose a light black color that I think would look well on me. We lie to him and say we are from Canada. I try on a couple of suit jackets and he determines that the second one looks perfect on me. I look at myself in the mirror and admit that a new suit would be nice, but right now we are just trying to figure out how to get out.

“How much,” I ask, genuinely curious, but still playing along. He punches some numbers onto a calculator and hands it to me to examine: 11,000 Baht. Quickly, I divide it by thirty-three, then erase it so he won't catch that I am converting to U.S. Dollars.

“Not bad,” I say. “Are you guys open tomorrow?”

“Yes, but fifty percent off is only tonight.”

Jenelle quickly chimes in: “That looks really tempting, but we would have to go back to the hotel where his brother is. His brother is in charge of the expense account. We don't have any money right now.”

He gives an incredulous look and says, “But fifty percent off is only tonight.”

Soon, we are able to weasel our way out of the tailor shop, and to our delight, the tuk-tuk driver is there waiting for us. Once again, we whiz off into the night, going who-knows-where.

Have you ever played pin the tail on the donkey, where they blind-fold you and spin you round and round and round? That's how it feels as we ride in the back of this tuk-tuk, hot and humid air blowing on our face, trusting a stranger who could drop us off anywhere in Bangkok.

After some high-speed traveling, our driver makes a turn, and suddenly there is a cluster of neon signs in Chinese script and packs of street stalls all along the sidewalks. I know where we are. We are on Yaowarat Road.

Yaowarat Road

The tuk-tuk is the official tourist taxi of Bangkok, Thailand. They are everywhere. They line the streets vying for business, and any time a tourist walks by you can hear a chorus of: “Tuk-tuk? Tuk-tuk?”

A different "model" of tuk-tuk in Southern Thailand.

This three-wheeled motorized contraption is the Thai version of the rickshaw. The name is onomatopoeic, imitating the sound that an engine makes. They may be used for any purpose, but in Bangkok they are largely used as a taxi. 

There are a few things that the visitor should know about the tuk-tuks and their drivers. First of all, they are all businessmen and are ultimately looking after their own pocket book. It is wise to negotiate a price before you commit to ride. If they know you are going to a large tourist destination like the Grand Palace or a Muy Thai fight, they will likely charge you much more. Also, if you are American, they will automatically believe you have deep pockets. Beware!

Around some of the famous attractions such as Wat Pho and the Grand Palace, they will hang out and tell tourists that the place is closed for the day. They do this in hope to lure you into a ride to somewhere else.

In spite of the warnings, taking a tuk-tuk ride is a must while you are in Bangkok. They are convenient and still relatively cheap. And best of all, it is just like a ride at Disneyland! An open-aired spin through the city with someone who barely speaks English to an unsure destination, is truly an adventure that no one should miss.

A villager uses a tuk-tuk on the southern island of Ko Klang.

The tuk-tuk experience varies in other areas of the country. In Southern Thailand, we learned that they had a different “model” that was a motorcycle with a cart attached to the side. Although we saw it used to transport people from time to time, it was certainly not a major form of taxi. The people primarily used it to carry goods and to give friends a ride. Sometimes they would use it as a vending cart and either sell food as they drove, or would park it at a market and set up shop.

Have you ever wondered what it's like to ride a tuk-tuk? Below is a video that I put together combining two trips—one from Wat Saket to the Grand Palace, and then a second on to Chinatown (not the same trip described above).

If you pay attention, there are many points of interest that you will see while cruising through Bangkok. Look for Wat Rajnadda, a pink taxi, Democracy Square, a picture of the king, other tuk-tuks, Grand Palace, road construction, 7-eleven, Kentucky Fried Chicken, tourist with a cowboy hat, Chinese lanterns . . . 

Enjoy! ♠